frustration..

i just hate people scolding without really knowing the truth, cause you cant really tell them what really happen and they won't just simply believe it.. is it even hard to ask nicely before scolding?? i think it gets you more angry if you're scolding without any reason and please think of the person's feeling ok.. i'm just doing it occasionally cause of the crowd.. i know it's bad but i know my own limit, can't you at least have some trust in me?? i know some of my friends are over the limit sometimes but they're still my friends, i can't just leave them and change a new surrounding cause it's really fuck'up to leave it just like that aft years of friendship.. i regreted on losing the person i really ever love and i'm terrified that i could lose you also.. i rather die than staying in an untrusted life.. so all you can do is just trust me and understand me more..

i know exam is coming and i know it's call the spm which is one of the most important exam in life.. i cant really fail it cause from the family tradition no one fail before on their big exam.. so it gets me more stress when he told me that and ask me whether i can still continue my studies or not cause i'm still hanging around sometimes.. all i want is just getting some A's to make them proud but to them, it's good enough if i can just pass all the subject, what it means by that anyway?? though my random mood and distractions is getting worse but i'm gonna fucking proof that i could do even better than passing the subjects.. if i dont, i will work hard to earn a living but not beggars that're gifted with hands and legs and begging for money to buy cigarretes, assholes..

people that dont know me much can just fuck off..